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The Fight That Went Wrong! - Milo

8/29/2018

1 Comment

 
Man I was cooked, I could barely walk I had blood running down my face like a river. Next thing you know, I hear sirens. i see pink and blue flashes of lights. I wake up breathing heavily, looked around everything was a blur I got out of bed and ran like a psychotic psycho. I ran for a good 10 minutes. then i stood still and slowly fell down the wall and started weeping, I put our entire life savings into that fight what am i going to tell her, MY Wife, i’m nervous its like i'm locked in a room full of stairs.

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1 Comment
Mrs A ( Team100WC)
8/30/2018 09:13:35 am

Uh-Oh! I wouldn't like to be in your character's shoes! I really liked the dramatic start. I was immediately asking questions and wanting to read more. There are a few punctuation errors; missing capital I and an exclamation point but they didn't stop the enjoyment of your piece. That image was a good use of a simile in that first sentence; poor fella! Keep up the good work!

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